I am so incredibly grateful to have the opportunity to carry another baby but I have to say, it has been one rough ride. The day I found out I was pregnant, I thought I had a stomach bug and was throwing up throughout the day, sick in bed feeling so miserable. I knew it had to be more then the stomach bug and it was, haha! I honestly feel like from that day on, I've had more sick and painful days vs. well days.
Photos by Arlene Easterwood
I went from having constant nausea, acid reflux, exhaustion to more exhaustion, gaining weight, so much pain from any type of movement, feeling sleepy all day, with more nausea thrown in. I'm to a point now where I am feeling mild contractions and swelling. I've been sweating this entire pregnancy and let's just say, I should be wearing diapers because I can barely make it to the bathroom in time to get the job done
Where was my pregnancy glow and that rush of energy women feel when they want to clean everything and get all the baby stuff ready? Let me tell you, this baby is coming and I don't even have a car seat to put that baby in, HAHA! I see these beautiful pregnant women walking around in their super fashionable maternity clothes with hair and makeup done, walking in heels and then I see me. Waddling for months, wearing moo moo dresses so I don't over heat, sandals so I don't fall over, huffing and puffing like an animal around town. Like really, can I just be cute? Haha! Have you ever seen that movie, "What to Expect When You're Expecting?" I totally remind myself of Wendy (see below)!
Because of how I've felt this entire pregnancy, I've found myself to be less enthusiastic about doing all the fun maternity things I did with Mila, but I knew I'd regret it if I didn't at least try. Maternity photos was something I held off for so long because I didn't know how to dress my body, I feel so uncomfortable with myself, but I knew I still wanted to capture this time in my life. Not just for me, but for my family. I want to make sure the little one growing in my belly has the same memories as Mila. I want her to be able to look back and see all of us together as one and to see how her mama looked while carrying her. But believe me, when she's old enough to understand, I WILL remind her of how difficult she was to carry, haha!
Someone who has had to take a backseat to this pregnancy is my poor little Mila. Any other mama's ever feel like they were a complete failure to their kids because of how sick they've felt? As the months went on, our trips to the park and library faded out, her ballet classes had to take a pause, and her TV time increased. Some days, I'd find her taking care of me more then I was taking care of her. She is such a little trooper for dealing with mama's temper and hormones. I am so surprised at how much of a big girl she's been and how understanding she has been to my emotions. I will never forget an evening when I was crying in bed from being in pain, and she stayed awake with me and patted my back. She kept saying, "It's okay mama," and her concern and comfort had me crying even harder. How do kids know? I'll never know. As we get closer to the end, she keeps patting my tummy and saying, "I'll take care of the baby, mama." I can't wait to get back to my old self so I can take care of her, my first baby.
Don't be fooled by the photos, I was sweating the entire time and I could barely walk because my feet swelled up in those booties I was wearing, lol. Shoutout to Brian and Arlene for basically carrying me around this area for me to get some cute shots.
I love this photo so much of Brian and I. Without Brian, there is no way I would have survived this pregnancy. He has literally done everything for me for months and I am forever thankful to him. He has listened to me complain, dealt with my heavy doses of hormones, made me amazing dinners, did my grocery shopping, took care of Mila, etc., etc. He's the best baby daddy a girl could ask for!
The baby will be here in just a couple of weeks and while I'm not prepared whatsoever, I cannot wait for the next chapter in our lives to begin as a family of four!
These beautiful photos were captured by Arlene Easterwood, check out her site for upcoming mini sessions! Click HERE!